Wes Welker's Wife

Just to be clear, I am in no way a sports fanatic. But I do love these little trophy wives and what they have to say– oh, and their husbands are fun to look at. Giselle’s little poor sport outburst (PSO) last year has nothing on Wes Welker’s wife’s this year. Giselle’s was just pure emotion, dramatic, no wit… boring. But Anna Welker (btw, she won Miss Hooters International back in ’05, so Hootie is born) really gave this some thought. As soon as I read her post, a giant Tom Haverford smile crept up on my face:

Her post read:

[In case that hastily snapped screenshot is too blurry, she rants: Proud of my husband and the Pats. By the way, if anyone is bored, please go to Ray Lewis' Wikipedia page. 6 kids 4 wives. Acquitted for murder. Paid a family off. Yay. What a hall of fame player! A true role model!]

Can’t even control myself. WOW! That is simply priceless. Hootie, you really PSO’d the shit out of this. You were witty and factual and relevant, which is key. The saracasm is just ridiculous and I love it. She knows how to trash talk with dark humor. That takes talent and creativity.

Of course, her husband’s publicist probably shit his pants when he saw this .2 seconds after she posted it and received thousands of ‘likes’. I’m sure he was all like, bitch give me your password NOW. But why come down so hard on her? Hootie clearly did her Wikipedia research and isn’t saying anything that isn’t public knowledge. Plus, she made it funny. And at least she’s real (I’m looking at you, Manti).

Let’s talk about Wes.. baby. (Boom, another nickname was born.) I’m almost positive a Bitchelle moment took place where Hootie was trying to explain away her finger fire click fest (FFCF) and he totally pulled the swing, roll, shovel. Swung his arm up onto the table, rolled his eyes and shoveled food into this mouth. Oh, Let’s Talk About Wes, I’ll say it again: at least she’s real.

Listen, I love you, Hootie. You prove what celebs time and time insist: you’re just like everybody else. That includes rude/mean/awesome thoughts. I can actually picture a stay-at-home posting this as her status:

Proud of my husband and the Pats flag football team. By the way, if anyone is bored, please go to Ray Lewis’ Wikipedia Sharon’s fiance’s facebook page. 6 2 kids 4 0 wives. Acquitted for of murder embezzlement. Paid a family off. Yay. What a hall of fame player fucking winner! A true role model!

Welcome, Hootie. Such mudslinging.

-whatupbabyt